BOLLYWOOD

Sonal Sehgal (Pooja) and Snenaz Treasuryvala (Shanaya) are the two actresses who will benefit most from RADIO - LOVE ON AIR. For these two, its showcase time with a good show reel and both put their best foot forward at the expense of Himesh Reshammiya. This singer-cum-composer-cum-songwriter-cum-actor had put up a decent performance in KARZZZZ after his disastrous acting debut with AAP KA SUROOR. With RADIO, he catches the wrong frequency.

There's more of commentary than actual action. Every move is first narrated to the viewer. Things then take place. This is where I think the director has failed miserably. You can feed the viewer once, but constantly opening up the act with a commentary and then continuing to do so is in bad taste, almost a slap on the viewers' face.

The hit song 'Maan ka radio...' which has been making waves on air for the last few months does not get even a decent footage... just bits of it... I mean the whole song is never played in one go for the viewer to enjoy.

The most glaring faux pas is the character Jhandulal (Paresh Rawal) who impersonates Ghanta Singh from Radio One 94.3 fm. And they keep saying Radio Mirchi... It's Hot!!! Ghanta Singh is this cool dude who makes calls to unsuspecting people inquiring about the services they have to offer, while all the time actually pulling a fast one on them.

Eighty percent of the movie is shot showing R J Vivan (Himesh) in the Radio Mirchi Studios. All they could have done was pick up a hit segment from their own radio station. Considering there was no genius in the plot, they could have upped the USP of their most famous RJ, the very eccentric but lovable, Jeeturaj.

As for the story, Vivan is an RJ working with Radio Mirchi. He has just divorced his wife Pooja. Shanaya enters his life quite by accident and that?s where things get complicated.

ZANJEER broke the shackles after 13 consecutive flops. AGNEEPATH was an experiment that had a class of its own. BLACK broke all barriers and now comes PAA. Let's give a standing ovation to the man who dominated the 80s and 90s and continues to surprise with his talent and willingness to subject himself to roles that require make-up for a complete change in appearance. Mr Amitabh Bachchan, for you Sir... the applause refuses to die off...

Playing a 13-year-old with a rare disease which causes him to age before time, Amitabh is class personified. Displaying an amazing flair and getting into character is like a cake-walk for him as Progeria (the disease he suffers from) ravages his tiny body. A special child with special abilities, Auro immediately makes a special place in your heart as you follow his short and brilliant life.

No self pity, just full of masti a kid his age would be. Auro has friends who form his support system apart from his mother (Vidya Balan) and his grandma who he lovingly calls 'Bum'

R Balakrishnan (aka R Balki) has tackled a very complex subject and has brought out the beauty of relationships in a very forceful manner without even one relationship in the movie going over the top. Be it the relationship between Vidya and Auro; Auro and his Bum, Auro and his friends or even Amol Arte (Abhishek Bachchan) and his dad (Paresh Rawal). Though centered around Auro and his disorder, Balki manages to draw all relationships to the fore.

Balki also manages to throw a positive light on sticky issues. Although he gets the point of the over-enthusiastic media, use of condoms, abortion and the political angle in, he does not sound preachy.

Christien Tinsley and Dominie Till turn a 66-year-old-plus Amitabh  to a very believable 13-year-old with their prosthetic make-up. And Amitabh, with his walking, talking and body language draws you even closer to Auro creating that Aura. Nothing flashy. He just delivers his lines like any, normal 13-year-old would.

Really, this movie is all about Auro and a kid that explodes from Amitabh. Vidya Balan is sedate and super in her role as the caring single mother. Abhishek is solid as the politician who will not let anything come between his dreams and Auro's friend, Vishnu is a treat.

Not much was revealed of the story before the release and I too will not spoil it for you by saying much. All I can say is that the end will have you reaching out for the kleenex.

Yes, Abhishek is his Paa. Yes, it's a rare father-son-son-father story. Yes, I think the makers should also consider putting a proposal to making PAA tax free. Also every paa should take his family for this movie.

Paa kasam, this film will rock you.

KURBAAN is NEW YORK. But with a different set of actors. KURBAAN is also SHOOT ON SIGHT, again with different actors. The plot remains the same, the twists and turns fails to surprise you and the end is inevitable. However, here, the love story has been hyped, thanks to Saif Ali Khan and Kareena Kapoor having an off-screen romance as well. But the intensity and the love undercurrents between Katrina Kaif and Neil Nitin Mukesh, and the romance between Kaif and John Abraham that was visible in NEW YORK is missing in KURBAAN.

Technically the movie is sound; acting wise, everyone chips in with a fine performance. The look, feel and action sequences are top class, but then you are not seeing anything new that has not been shown in the recent past. The above-mentioned films are just the recent references.

Ehsaan (Saif Ali Khan) falls in love with Avantika (Kareena Kapoor). Both teach in the same college in New Delhi. Avantika is back from the US, as she had to tend to her ailing father. Six month later, she gets a call from her University to come back. Ehsaan says he does not mind sacrificing his career to join her. He is traditional he says, not selfish. So off they go to the US and manage to find a home in an Indian neighbourhood. She also manages to find him a job in her college. Their neighbours befriend the new couple and that's when things spiral out of control.

There are many loose ends. The US knows Ehsaan as Khalid the dreaded terrorist. They have his photograph. When he comes back to the US with Avantika as Ehsaan, he has just trimmed his beard to a French cut. He still looks the same, yet they cannot detect him entering Kennedy Airport!

If you believe in fairytales, you can be a part of it. This is what Hitchcock (not Alfred), but Johnny Lever's character keeps repeating. Indeed, if you believe in fairytales, this film is for you. There is no doubt about it.

It's what all fairytales are like and it does not disappoint. Forget the fact that it is a borrowed concept; a remake of Hollywood's BIG, starring Tom Hanks. Though not lifted frame for frame, producer Aftab Shivdasani, who also takes credit as the storywriter does inject his own ideas too. A decent attempt by this first time producer.

The setting is surreal and immediately gets you into a storybook mould. The characters etched are befitting the genre and you should have no complaints with the plot and premise too. Remember, this is a movie for kids, released a day before Children's Day.

Mickey is a young boy of 12 who is besotted by 22-year-old town beauty Mitika (Aamna Sharif). He has a friend in Bonny who he spends most of his waking time with. At home, his father is not too pleased with his 'out of school' activities, while his mother is always protective about him. It appears that Mickey is their adopted son and this fact is known to Mickey during one of the arguments his parents have over him. He also has a kid sister he adores.

Coming back to the plot, Mickey is desperate to woo Mitika and he is helped by Hitchcock, who, it appears, knows everything about everybody. Mickey is helped to make a wish at the wishing well, and the next morning he is BIG enough to woo Mitika. Then begins the process of falling in love and the ultimate marriage day, where Mickey (Aftab) becomes his small self.

Aftab makes an attempt to stay in character. As a 12-year-old trapped in a man's body, he is impressive. Aamna, who made her debut earlier this year with ALOO CHAAT starring Aftab alongside, gives a confident show this time. Though she has not much of a depth in her role, she does enough to impress and send out signals to filmmakers, that this here is a pretty face who can act as well.

However, considering that this is a children's film and passed with a U certificate, I wonder how the censors passed the scene where Aftab meets a 'Commercial sex worker' on the streets and brings her home for the night. It gets extremely embarrassing for parents who have come in with their kids. This for me is the only jarring point. Otherwise, it's a decent film for kids.

The deluge of July 26, 2005 is just an aberration; it's not the crux of the story. The romance began some six years ago and due to irrevocable differences between Akshay (Emraan Hashmi) and Sanjana (Soha Ali Khan), the two part ways, although intensely in love. Commitment was something Akshay was not familiar with; rather, he was wary of it.

So you have the two main leads meeting somewhere in South Africa. Cupid strikes and its love at first sight. Akshay is a struggling artist while Sanjana is a little princess, living in a palatial home and working for a magazine. The two move in to 'live in' and there in creep the differences

Akshay is fed up because he is not going anywhere with his paintings, while Sanjana is only too happy to be able to support the two. Akshay finally gets an offer as a creative head of a team and asks Sanjana to join him. She refuses and asks him to marry her. He is not ready. They part ways.

All this is told in flashback and the meeting point is the flight back to Mumbai at Heathrow Airport. They meet after six years, exchange pleasantries and when they land in Mumbai, are caught up in the storm. Here their romance is rekindled.

Soha Ali Khan is confident from frame one. This girl seduces the camera with her confident body language and easy dialogue delivery. She makes the right move at every turn adding that air of credibility to the fragility of her romance with Emraan. The 'kiss man' gets his mandatory smooch and is quite convincing as the 'desperate to make it big', loser boyfriend.

Mantra, Emraan's buddy is another actor who catches the eye. This lad has talent and essays his role with panache.

The lyrics melt with the mood and the music blends with the scenes. The story, like all Bhatt films is heavy on romance and the uneasy pain of loving and leaving. Given the backdrop of the deluge, director Kunal Deshmukh makes a valiant attempt of recreating the last moments of TITANIC. The scenes showing the floods are close to real and take you back in time when the streets became one big sea and the message at the end is 'Stay indoors when it rains.'

Though the film does manage to tug at your heart the length is a big bother, a little snip here and a big cut there would have done wonders for this film. The lead pair of Emraan and Soha is fantastic.

It is dark, distressing and deeply disturbing, like most, Madhur Bhandarkar films. After feeble attempts with TRAFFIC SIGNAL and FASHION, Madhur roars in form once again. JAIL will have you thinking.

The National Award winning director, this time focuses on the tragic lives of those behind bars. The brokenness they have to deal with, the foolishness of that 'one-second anger' that led to murder, which they are now regretting or even how the innocent battle for justice. JAIL is one such story that focuses on the innocence of Parag Dixit (Neil Nitin Mukesh) and slowly unwraps the other areas, which need to be addressed to the common man. If you have an appetite for hardcore reality cinema, 'This Is It'!

Parag is living a dream life with a good position in a multi-national and Mansi (Mugdha Godse), a girlfriend who understands his needs. One day, things take an ugly turn when his car is intercepted by the police. His roommate who is travelling with him, urges him to drive faster when he sees a cop van trailing. However, Parag slows down, while his friend jumps out and starts shooting at the police. Too shocked to understand what has happened in a split second, Parag sees his roommate being hit by a bullet and a bag full of cocaine recovered from the backseat.

It is all a daze for Parag as he is handcuffed and led to the police station and eventually to the lock-up. His only hope of acquittal is his roommate who is in the ICU. His friend had cleverly made deals using Parag's mobile, and all the while Parag thought that it was bad network that had his friend using his phone when at home. As luck would have it, his friend dies and that is the beginning of a fresh ordeal for Parag.

It is not close to what prison cells are but Madhur manages to bring the uneasiness and fear that dwells deep within the prison walls. He touches on corrupt police officials and their nexus between the underworld. But what is most disturbing is that there are many who are languishing behind bars without a proper trial. Some like Parag are even innocent.

Neil Nitin Mukesh gives a powerhouse performance. Easily, his act is worthy of the Best Actor Award in the coming year. Even in his silence, he cries out to you with a deafening roar. His body language and emotions are an absolute stunner. He lends that touch of credibility to his character portraying his vulnerability with an expertise found in veterans.

Arya Babbar as Kabir Malik, a prisoner who works for the underworld, and who scouts for potential sharpshooters in their desperate need to get out of jail is a class act. Studied, and focused, he matches Neil 'frame for frame' with his scenes. Manoj Bajpai as Nawaab, a prisoner who has found favour with the top jail authorities too chips in with a powerful performance. Between these three, they make JAIL what it is.

There are a few loose shots, like Manoj Bajpai's back-story, Ghalib's escape and an old veteran explaining how he landed behind bars despite winning many Government awards. This dilutes the focus and intensity of the film.

However, overall, JAIL is worth a watch.

Darshan Jariwala, Govind Namdeo and Zakir Husain have come up with the most unconvincing performances in recent times. Stuck with a poorly etched character, they find it difficult to move beyond first gear and stutter and stop at most times. At best, you can label their characters silly. All three are very good actors, mind you. Ranbir Kapoor, stuck with the same formula, (poorly etched character) comes up trumps. His role, too, has neither meat nor meaning, yet, he manages to blaze through on the sheer power of his acting abilities. This kid has star power written all over him. Even the silliest scenes he turns on the top of its head. You cannot help but marvel at the ease with which he consumes his lines; so much passion for even a dead role.

Yes, that's what Raj Kumar Santoshi's latest offering is. Prem (Ranbir Kapoor) runs Happy Club along with his friends. Their motto is simple; keep everyone happy and help lovers in distress. As president of the club, Prem and his gang go to any length to make sure two lovers get married. Even if it means getting the one he loves Jennifer, (Katrina Kaif) married off to the one she loves.

There are enough comic situations to justify that this is a comedy but not enough substance to validate the overemphasis on love. In the end, it's more a masala flick than a comedy.

But thanks to Ranbir, this film becomes bearable and there are moments he has you in his grasp, either with his performance or simply by his sheer presence. Katrina Kaif looks pretty as usual and has done a good job. However, I get a feeling that she has been miscast in this role. But when you look at it from the distributors and marketing point of view, this is a super jodi. I'm sure we will see more of them together.

The film swings like a pendulum; at one moment, it takes off and at another, it just drops. The track between the gangster (Zakir Husain) is uncalled for and lengthens the movie unnecessarily. As for the track with Rahul (Upen Patel), it's very, very long.

Just one question to Ranbir Kapoor and the people who have marketed this film: was it necessary to time the break-up story (if at all it is true) with girlfriend Deepika Padukone a few days before the release? I mean, C'mon, Ranbir can get the audience into the theatres on the strength of his performance. He does not need cheap publicity gimmicks to create a buzz about the film. On second thoughts, maybe Ranbir had no choice but to play to the market and make sure the film capitalized on the 'initials'. Love be damned.

Aladin (the film) is no Genius as Amitabh Bachchan's character is, but the movie does transport you to fantasyland, as its genre promises. Right from Boman Irani's voice-over in the beginning, the film carries you to a place called Khwaish, where Sujoy Ghosh rubs his palms, has his actors in slick get-ups, and sets to match the mood. Its fantasyland all right when Aladin (Riteish Deshmukh) is bullied by his friends from childhood to rub a lamp in the hope of a genie appearing. ''Aladin, Aladin kahan hai tera genie,'' his friends harass him all through his growing-up years.

However, things change when Jasmine (Jacqueline Fernandez) walks into his class on his birthday. Kasim (Sahil Khan), the big bully organizes a birthday bash to impress Jasmine. He convinces Jasmine that Aladin likes lamps and they buy him one as his birthday gift. Once again, they force him to rub the lamp. He refuses, but on Jasmine's insistence, he does oblige. Out comes Genius the genie (Amitabh Bachchan). From then on, its all between Genie and Aladin. He has three wishes but he wastes them all on Jasmine! There's also a twist in the tale in the form of Ring Master (Sanjay Dutt) who plays the bad Genie who wants all powers for himself.

Jacqueline waltzes through her part with the grace of a gazelle. She has the looks and the talent to make a mark. Amitabh is in 'high energy' mode giving the formulaic image of a fat man who we have come to identify with a Genie, a novel twist. Whether he is dancing or fighting, he is still 'Ab Tak Bachchan'. The style and the charismatic power are there for all to see. Riteish is slowly but steadily making a mark of his own. Dutt injects the necessary evil ingredient.

The look and feel of the film given by Sabu Cyril is commendable and the music by Vishal Dadlani and Shekhar Ravjiani has you tapping your feet. Choreography is top class and costumes deserve a special mention.

This film should have been released at the start of the Diwali vacations; nevertheless, kids will have a blast. Grown-ups too will love it, provided they are willing to take a trip down fantasyland.

Sssssssshhhhhhh! DO KNOT DISTURB... This is a knotty affair... Enter at your own risk!

David Dhawan has flopped and flopped miserably. He comes out with no script, creates silly situations and expects his cast to enact with conviction and have the audience in splits. Pity, because he had such a talented line-up of stars that are sadly made to jump around without rhyme or reason. Govinda, Riteish Deshmukh, Rajpal Yadav, Ranvir Shorey, Sohail Khan, Lara Dutta... all are made to do meaningless scenes.

It all starts because Govinda has been caught in a frame with his girlfriend. Fortunately, for Govinda, Riteish Deshmukh wanders into the frame while the photograph is being taken. The said photograph lands on Sushmita Sen's table. She wants to get to the bottom of her husband's affair. She hires a detective to follow Govinda while Govinda tracks down Riteish and pays him to pretend to be Lara Dutta's boyfriend. From one bizarre situation to another, the movie moves on...

Songs pop up at unexpected turns and you end up feeling bad for the director who gave us a few No. 1 hits.

I don't know why, but I get this feeling that this movie has been cleverly crafted and executed to herald Rani Mukherjee's second coming. Producer Aditya Chopra along with director Anurag Singh has made sure this is a Rani fare all the way and she gets most of the screen time. After all, it has been a long time Rani has been seen on screen. And to be fair to the actor, she has done a brilliant job. Showing the fire of old and a spark that still glows, Rani lights up the screen every time she comes on. Be it in the get-up as a male cricketer or as the village belle. She has enough and more scenes and dialogues to steam ahead in the numbers game. Others beware, the GHULAM girl is back with a bang. There's no dum in the story. It's a remix of Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi and Chak De, both Yash Raj films. There are also enough references to the other hits from their banner, as is customary in all their films. Veera Kaur (Rani Mukherjee) is a cricketer who can hit six sixes in an over. Gary Sobers, Ravi Shastri and Yuvraj Singh be damned. She works in a local theatre group but dreams of donning the India colours. Her argument is simple; if Indira Gandhi could run the nation, Kiran Bedi tame prisoners in Tihar jail and Sunita Williams land on the moon, why cannot she play cricket for the Indian team. Good question! So to make her dream come true she turns into Veer Pratap Singh, complete with a moustache and a beard to enter the selection trials for a local club. Here she runs into (Rohan) Shahid Kapur, who has specially come down from England to help his dad's team, which has been consistently losing, get the winning edge. Dad and Mom are not on talking terms. Seems like she wanted to settle in England and he in India. So son spends most time in England Rohan selects Veer Pratap Singh blissfully unaware that he is a girl, falls in love with Veera, thinking she is Veer's sister, realizes his folly during the all-important match, asks her to sit out, and then, when they are nine wickets down and on the verge of losing the match to a Pakistan team, requests her to pad up. No prizes for guessing which team wins.

There's no dum in the story. It's a remix of Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi and Chak De, both Yash Raj films. There are also enough references to the other hits from their banner, as is customary in all their films.

Veera Kaur (Rani Mukherjee) is a cricketer who can hit six sixes in an over. Gary Sobers, Ravi Shastri and Yuvraj Singh be damned. She works in a local theatre group but dreams of donning the India colours. Her argument is simple; if Indira Gandhi could run the nation, Kiran Bedi tame prisoners in Tihar jail and Sunita Williams land on the moon, why cannot she play cricket for the Indian team. Good question!

So to make her dream come true she turns into Veer Pratap Singh, complete with a moustache and a beard to enter the selection trials for a local club. Here she runs into (Rohan) Shahid Kapur, who has specially come down from England to help his dad's team, which has been consistently losing, get the winning edge. Dad and Mom are not on talking terms. Seems like she wanted to settle in England and he in India. So son spends most time in England

Rohan selects Veer Pratap Singh blissfully unaware that he is a girl, falls in love with Veera, thinking she is Veer's sister, realizes his folly during the all-important match, asks her to sit out, and then, when they are nine wickets down and on the verge of losing the match to a Pakistan team, requests her to pad up. No prizes for guessing which team wins.

Wanted: A tighter script. Wanted: Better editing. Wanted: A smooth flow of scenes. What you get instead is a 'leave-your-brains-behind' fare replete with frenzied plots, typical of Bollywood films of an era gone by, which cared two hoots about script or screenplay. But Salman Khan fans need not fear, WANTED is all about the Khan. Here he is on a killing spree. One after the other, bad guys get bumped off, either to a bullet or to his fist. Last week BAABARR, did the killing, this week it is Radhe (Salman Khan) who works for moneybhai (meaning, he kills for money). And he kills with passionate glee! There's also Gani bhai, Golden and Datta Pawle who do the killing. They are hardcore underworld characters who feed the cops and bleed the city. A bad cop is thrown in for good measure in the form of Inspector Talpade (Mahesh Manjrekar). Talpade decides which girl he wants to size up and does so in public! Of course there is also Ayesha Takia. Poor girl, she doesn't know if she is coming or going. I mean there are no links to her scenes and no meaning to her dialogues either. From a call centre where she works, she is either going to meet Radhe or to her aerobic classes. She has a kid brother who takes the 8pm local (empty). It is not clear whether he is going home or coming home

QUICK GUN MURUGUN enthralled us with his lingo and distinct dialect almost a decade ago when he entered our living rooms through MTV. He was a creation of Shashank Ghosh. ''Mind it'' and ''We are like this only'' became popular lines and are used even today. The man has now made it as a hero, thanks to his creator who is also the director of this film.

The movie traces almost 25 years in the life of QUICK GUN MURUGUN who is bumped off by Rice Plate Reddy, the baddie. Rice Plate Reddy is forcefully turning all the pure vegetarian restaurants into non-veg ones and Murugun 'is not liking it' one bit. He polishes off his cronies 'Phatak se', with the subtle use of his guns and nimble hands. The bullets find its target after ricocheting off various objects. Rice Plate Reddy is angry and finishes off Murugun with a bullet to his heart. Yamraj descends to take his soul and all the way to heaven Murugun says, ''I want to go back''. At the registration counter 'Up There', he manages to convince the 'Heavenly Clerk' to send him back. He does come back, 25-years-later, but not in Kerala. Murugun is dropped at Gateway of India in Mumbai.

Rice Plate Reddy has by now set up a chain of McDosas all over the city of Mumbai and is also going international. Murugun's search for him leads to a volley of explosions and countless dead bodies. Yes, Murugun finishes off Rice Plate Reddy. He came from heaven on a mission, you see!

At best, you can enjoy this flick, mainly in English, partly in Malayalam with a little bit of Hindi and a few English sub-titles, for over 15 minutes. Then it gets bothersome. It's like the joke has gone too far. The violence is gory and you don't even see a joke in it. If it was a television film, you would not have 'Mind It'! As a full length feature... well, 'They are like that only...''

Dr Rajendra Prasad as QUICK GUN MURUGUN has his fingers on the trigger but it is Rice Plate Reddy played by Naseer who is the scene-stealer. This guy is a pocket dynamo. Close on his heels in the menace department is the actor who plays MBA, a perfect villain.

If you have a stomach for non-stop violence and senseless killings, try this Rice Plate, its Reddy-made. If not... MIND IT!

Director Srinivas Bhashyam has tackled an interesting subject on 'commitment phobia' and 'lust over love', which plagues most of the youth of today. He has handled the subject with sensitivity, bringing to fore the many emotions and driving home a powerful point. Of course, the end is not what was expected; it's clich餮 A 'tadka' towards the conclusion would have made this LOVE KHICHDI, even more delicious.

All the same, he has managed his ensemble cast to perfection and extracted good performances from all of them. Vir (Randeep Hooda) is your typical hot-blooded 26-year-old from Chandigarh who is working as a chef in a five-star hotel in Mumbai. For him, life is all about discos and dating girls. His weapon is his English and his super-confidence in approaching any PYT. It's this journey of his in search of 'sex' that Bhashyam explores.

He has a friend who works with him, Sandhya Iyengar (Sada). Though just friends, for Sandhya, Vir is extra special. And even though she is aware of his escapades, her love for him is real. This love of hers is what changes the 'skirt chasing' Vir towards the end to tame him to domestic bliss.

While Vir thinks he is taking the girls for a ride, there are a few, who beat him to his game. Lost in lust, he is confused as to what he really wants.

Playing the modest Romeo, Randeep Hooda is a joy. From one relationship to another, he dishes out an interesting gamut of emotions. Be it with the girl besotted by him who lives in his building Deepti (Riya Sen); an NRI returned business woman Nafisa Khan (Kalpana Pandit); his landlord's wife Parminder Kaur (Divya Dutta), or Sharmistha Basu (Ritapurna Sengupta). From one woman to another, he displays the pain and pleasure of it all. This guy is one helluva natural and deserves his due.

Among the girls, it's Sada who steals the show. As the one who is silently in love with Vir, and as his constant companion witnessing all his romps, she demonstrates her hopelessness with a touch of boldness, which in turn has the desired effect on Vir.

Most scenes are sure to have an instant connect with the ?youngsters' of today and I'm sure they will lap this Khichdi with glee. On the flip side, considering there is a khichdi of releases (six in all), it might be a little difficult

Douglas Lazarus an upright, God-fearing Income Tax officer, is dead. It's his funeral and what happens there is what the movie DADDY COOL is all about. The location is Goa and the mourners are close family and friends. There is also an intruder who hovers around the coffin. The family thinks him to be Douglas' friend until he reveals his true identity. This turns the funeral house 'upside down'.

Prior to this, an unsuspecting capsule housed in a Relaxo bottle is the cause of much pain for Michael (Aftab Shivdasani) and a lot of fun on screen. What the capsule contains is some hallucinating drug managed by Harry (Chunkey Pandey), Michael's to-be brother-in-law. Michael is administered the capsule by his girlfriend Maria (Tulip Joshi) because he is hyper about facing her father at the funeral. That one capsule begins the rout at the funeral. That is until the intruder; Andrew Symonds (Rajpal Yadav) makes known his intention.

So you can imagine the scene where the mourning family is already harassed when they are delivered the coffin with the wrong body minutes before the mourners arrive. Elder son Steven Lazarus (Suniel Shetty) is aghast. So is his mother, Suhasini Mullay. In the kitchen, Steven's wife, Nancy (Aarti Chhabria) makes plans of shifting house. She finds this an ideal opportunity to get away from her nagging mother-in-law. But Steven's younger brother Brian (Aashish Chowdry), a successful novelist living in Mumbai, prefers his pet dogs to his mother. Steve is in a fix!

Coming to the funeral are Carlos (Jaaved Jaffery), his wife Jenny (Kim Sharma) and friend Jim (Vrajesh Hirjee). Battered by his wife and bullied by his friends, Carlos takes everything with his chin up, until the shit hits the fan! Stumbling onto the scene of mourning is Ayesha (Sophie Choudhary), an aspiring model who will do whatever it takes to reach the top. She is looking out for her Carlos who told her he would be dressed in a black suit. As it turns out, she meets a room full of men in black!

Mixing up these situations, Director K Murali Mohan Rao, dishes out a laugh-riot. From one comic situation to another, Rao manages to maintain the momentum for most part. Aftab excels in his role. Looks like the boy has done a perfect study of Rowan Atkinson AKA Mr Bean. Ditto Suniel Shetty. He maintains a cool calm amidst the madness to sometimes blow his top. Aashish Chowdry is slowly making the grade to being taken as a serious actor. Vrajesh Hirjee is good in his 'Jim act' while Jaaved Jaffery, though endearing at most times, goes overboard with his 'what maan' dialogues. Rajpal Yadav intensifies the laughs when he comes on scene. There's also Uncle Murphy (Prem Chopra) who comes to the funeral on a wheel chair.

While most jokes stay within the limit, there are a few that cross the line, like the one with Jaffery and the guy who plays a Priest.

Kisaan does not delve deep into the problems of farmers in remote India (read suicide) but scratches gingerly on the surface. It's sad, because this film had the potential of being taken rather seriously; entertaining as well as educating.

Although it briefly touches on the malady of farmer suicides and land sharks, it does not go the distance. It ends up being a 'typical Bollywood masala flick'.

The film is about Dayal Singh (Jackie Shroff), a widower, who raises his two sons Aman (Arbaaz Khan) and Jigar (Sohail Khan) singlehandedly. He faithfully toils with his sons on his ancestral land as a true farmer would. One day, his neighbour commits suicide because he had taken a meager loan and could not repay it. Also, he had given his thumb impression on a blank piece of paper to the loan sharks. That paper turned out to be his noose.

Deeply disturbed, Dayal decides to send his elder son to the city to get a degree in law. Fifteen years later, when Aman returns to his village, with a law degree in hand, he is facing a rather peculiar problem. Sohan Seth (Dalip Tahil) an industrialist wants the farmers to sell their land. He is willing to pay more than the market rate. While most agree, others are being forced. Dayal and his sons are of the opinion that no one should be forced. In one such meeting, the melee, Dayal is slapped by a local goon who has teamed up with Sohan. Being the lawyer that he is, Aman stops his dad from retaliating. However, when Jigar, who was not at the scene, learns of the incident, he exacts revenge by cutting the hand of the offender.

From there on the film sinks into melodrama with Sohan befriending Aman and causing a rift in the family. To add glamour, there is Dia Mirza paired opposite Arbaaz and Nauheeh Cyrusi as Titli (cute) who is Sohail's love interest.

Jackie Shroff is solid, giving off a very good performance as the father and farmer who is protective of his land and fiercely proud of his sons. After his debut flick HERO and later GARDISH, Jaggu stands out yet again. There's something about Sohail Khan that strikes you. I think it is the sincerity of his performance. As the hotheaded son with an immense love for his father and land, he is a powerhouse. Arbaaz's vague wig casts an unreal air around him.

The music has a distinct feel of eighties, which goes well with the theme. With over five releases this week, the film will hit bulls-eye in the rural areas of India. Producer Sohail will have to make sure they get a tax-free entry onto the theatres.

It takes a 'brave man' with strength in his wealth to produce a film propelling him as a leading actor. It takes an even braver man to direct a film as kitsch as this.

Naseer Khan is the leading man; he is also the co-producer of SHADOW. In real life, he is also blind. The move is meant to prove that blind men can act and indulge in dare-devilry, which even guys with proper vision cannot. Nothing wrong in that. In fact, it's a very bold and creative attempt. But how about taking some acting
lessons before dumping yourself on unsuspecting audiences? Although the concept is kind of 'cute', things could have worked in favour of Naseer and the film had the cast and crew made a decent attempt to enact the scenes. At best, this is like a home video gone horribly wrong.

The story is about Naseer Khan who plays a sharp shooter Arjun Sherawat and also doubles up as a car mechanic who can fix a car just by moving his hands beneath the bonnet. As a sharp shooter, he does not miss his target, so why did his miss his first target, the person who raped his sister? Had he bumped that corrupt politician off in the first instance, we would not have been bored with this headache. But then again, if he had, there would have been no film like SHADOW.

I know its mean, but don't even let your SHADOW in for this flick!

Nothing is clear; the only thing evident is that there is friction in Kashmir between the militants, religious heads and a reformed politician. When the movie ends, the end line says, ''This movie is dedicated to the children of Kashmir.''

So, aptly, there are two kids who take you through life in a troubled valley. Parzan Dastur (Sikandar) is a 14-year-old who is good at soccer in his school but is targeted by three bullies from his school because of his brilliance with the ball. Ayesha Kapur (Nasreen) another 14-year-old befriends Sikandar and the two become good friends. One day, Sikandar chances upon a gun by the wayside. He picks it up to teach a lesson to his bullies. But that one move, changes the course of his motives.

Though, by the end, you pretty much have things sorted out in your head, you wonder why director Piyush Jha failed to build his characters. There's no bite in the bait and no chill in the kill. Every scene is treated like any other and that's what spells disaster for the film. There is just one definite drone, scene after scene.


Madhavan and Sanjay Suri go about listlessly. Can't blame them really. It's only Parzan and Ayesha who get a scope to display their acting prowess. Arunoday Singh, who makes his debut, injects sufficient life in his portrayal as Zahgeer Quadir, a militant leader.

What Jha was trying to portray was the blooding in of the innocent children by the militants. What he ends up showing is a pale disaster.